|
Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving youforever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to showfor it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me thatyou quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home& didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favourite meal& even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, &went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me youlove me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband& wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whateverthe case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving awayto West Virginia together! Have a great life! Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s trueyou & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cryfrom what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out yourconstant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when yougot a haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look justlike a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t saysomething nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favourite meal, youmust have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the$49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that mysister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I stillloved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when Igot home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope youhave the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter youwrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla wasborn Carl. I hope that’s not a problem. | 
发表于 2013-8-17 14:39:23
分享
收藏
