当碰到除了“跟我长的一样”，别的“全部都不一样”，这个identity transition, and the pressure of "make sense of what he or she experienced" 全都压在一个单独的个体上，自己去面对，这个压力是非常非常大的。
这个需要很强很强的EQ，和适应能力，去适应身份的转换，以及对差异的包容。
people try to "make sanse" /interpreting / reasoning things based on what they already know or based on what they think they know.
所以说啊，NBC实际上是非常小的一群“有共同经历”的，很孤独的人。表面上看不出，内心深处实际上是很脆弱很孤独的。
they have to deal with 10 times more frequent of "being rejected" by others one way or another on daily basis by themsleve than average chinese or american grown up in their own society.
